Gratitude
It's everywhere: your friend, your colleague and even your mom (and maybe that special someone, if you're lucky?) have probably told you what their new year's resolutions are going to be. But have YOU stopped to look back and think about the things that you already have accomplished?
As I (well, not just "I"; all of us, actually) approach the new year, I like to make a list of the things I've done, seen, experienced and tried this year. Mainly, the things I'm grateful for. The list of gratitude, I call it.
To me, being grateful means appreciating what I already have. In fact, according to a number of studies, practicing gratitude leads to higher levels of happiness and joy, fewer symptoms of physical illness, spending more time exercising, being more optimistic and satisfied with our lives, increased sense of connection with others, and even a better quality of sleep each night. People suffering from depression are also advised to try express their gratitude, as this change of perception and attitude can help see things from a clearer perspective.
Evidently, gratitude and happiness are closely linked. This can be even proven with this little social experiment conducted by Soulpancake, which I totally recommend watching:
Obviously, feeling gratitude is important. But as John F. Kennedy put it,
"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them."
So do remember that it's not just our thoughts, but also our actions that matter! Practice your gratitude and act upon it.
Why being satisfied with what you have is important?
Because our mind can be easily tricked into developing new needs and desires, without even considering that we you already have is enough! Here, practicing gratitude is key. I think this story by Ajahn Brahm illustrates my point pretty well:
Monks aren’t allowed to accept, own, or handle any money, whatever its kind. We are so poor that we mess up government statistics. We live frugally on the unsolicited, simple gifts from our lay supporters. However, infrequently we may be offered something special.
I had helped a Thai man with a personal problem. Out of gratitude, he said to me: “Sir, I would like to give you something for your personal use. What can I get you for the amount of five hundred baht?” It was usual to quote the amount when making such an offering, to avoid any misunderstanding. Since I couldn’t think what I wanted straight away and he was in a hurry, we agreed that I could tell him the next day when he returned.
Before this occurred, I was a happy little monk. Now I started to contemplate what I wanted. I made a list. The list grew. Soon, five hundred baht wasn’t enough. But it was so difficult to take anything off the list. Wants had appeared out of nowhere and solidified into absolute necessities. And the list kept growing. Now, five thousand baht wasn’t sufficient!
Seeing what was happening, I threw my wish list away. The next day, I told my benefactor to give the five hundred baht to the monastery building fund or to some other good cause. I didn’t want it.
What I wanted most of all was to regain the rare contentment I had had the day before. When I had no money, nor the means to get anything, that was the time when all my wishes were fulfilled.
I had helped a Thai man with a personal problem. Out of gratitude, he said to me: “Sir, I would like to give you something for your personal use. What can I get you for the amount of five hundred baht?” It was usual to quote the amount when making such an offering, to avoid any misunderstanding. Since I couldn’t think what I wanted straight away and he was in a hurry, we agreed that I could tell him the next day when he returned.
Before this occurred, I was a happy little monk. Now I started to contemplate what I wanted. I made a list. The list grew. Soon, five hundred baht wasn’t enough. But it was so difficult to take anything off the list. Wants had appeared out of nowhere and solidified into absolute necessities. And the list kept growing. Now, five thousand baht wasn’t sufficient!
Seeing what was happening, I threw my wish list away. The next day, I told my benefactor to give the five hundred baht to the monastery building fund or to some other good cause. I didn’t want it.
What I wanted most of all was to regain the rare contentment I had had the day before. When I had no money, nor the means to get anything, that was the time when all my wishes were fulfilled.
Wanting has no end to it. Even one billion baht isn’t enough, nor one billion dollars. But freedom from wanting has an end. It is when you want for nothing.
Contentment is the only time you have enough.
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